God knows what He's doing! The Lord always has a reason, a purpose! You don't have to understand. All you have to do is let it accomplish His purpose!
"All things truly work together for good to them that love the Lord." (Rom.8:28)--No matter what it is. It may not always seem like it, but God often gets His greatest victories out of seeming defeat, the advantage of a handicap! Perhaps it is meant to be a strength-giver to you, and to equip you for giving strength to others.
When Dr. Moon of Brighton, England, was stricken with blindness, he said, "Lord, I accept this talent of blindness from Thee. Help me to use it for Thy glory that at Thy coming Thou mayest receive Thine Own with interest." Then God enabled him to invent the Moon Alphabet for the blind, by which thousands of blind people were enabled to read the Word of God, and many of them were gloriously saved!
So don't give up! Don't drown in your sorrows! Make an advantage out of your handicap! Build a bridge out of your broken dreams and set those ships asail again! This need not be the end, only the beginning!